Saturday, February 6, 2010

Negative Vibrations


Living with a manipulative and controlling mother whose pastimes are arguing and debating unfortunately heighten the stress level among my body. I'm listening to reggae music at the moment, instead of my usual Carnatic music.
Looking up new mehndi designs and information on Ayurvedic medicine with regards to nose piercing. My mother doesn't understand the reason behind my want to have my nose pierced - is not just for fashion. It is for beauty, medicine, and the culture that best fits me.
If not tonight, then tomorrow I am planning on get my nose pierced. Her controlling over me and saying she is going to kill my fish if I get my nose pierced is like punishing me for striving to be myself. Her acting this way is like punishing a male child for being gay and wearing the appropriate fashionable clothes for that lifestyle.
My heart hurts because of what she does and because she won't let me be who I want to be. This is not a choice that I have randomly made perhaps because I am influenced by the people I am around. No, this is choice that I have made based on legitimate and appropriate reasons that I truly believe in with regards to MY lifestyle, NOT hers.

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